Evil

3-22-11

I've never been a real big fan of squirrels, but I generally don't pay a lot of attention to their mindless chattering and annoyingly erratic behavior. However, in the past few weeks I've started cutting across Cal's campus on my way to work because it's a nicer walk and because it adds about 3 minutes to my walk which in effect allows me to get through an entire episode of Radiolab or This American Life (vs. having about 3 minutes left as I walk in the door - which is really troubling...I think about those last 3 minutes all day!). During this time I've noticed that the squirrels on Cal's campus are...how can I put this delicately? They're aggressive little mofos. This one followed me for a good block and he kept rearing up on his hind legs like he was gonna bust out some kung fu or an uzi or something. I noticed that they seem to have these weird dark patches/patterns on them. Do you see what I mean? Does that look like some sort of gang symbol to you? It looks like a gang symbol to me.

I don't trust you, squirrels. You were off my radar for a while, but congratulations. You freak me out, and you're on my shit list now. Right up there with those scary whales.